In honor of these tragic events that are still continuing through April, and by “tragic events” I mean the Coronavirus, I would like to tell a nice story of a community standing strong, trying to help out the restaurant owners. I live in a small town, but we are known for one giant company that was founded here; Jack Link’s beef jerky (you can do your own researching if you want to know what town it is). Anyway, this company has been the heart of our town by putting us on the map and helping out our very small community in momentous ways through acts of donations to supporting the people.

However, this company has outdone themselves by giving FREE pizza (30 of them to be exact) to their hard workers every Monday, Wednesday, and Friday for two weeks. How does this relate to money and restaurants you may ask?  Well, they have to get the pizzas somehow! So, a good friend of mine works at this family owned bar/restaurant (hint, hint, she’s the daughter of the owner), and told me what the company was doing for its employees and how the company is paying for all the pizzas, but isn’t charging their employees. The restaurant is getting a lot of money and business from this deal they made, which was desperately needed. Deals like these help keep businesses afloat during a time like this.

Restaurants are getting hit hard with this pandemic, and many need as much support from the community as possible. There are lots of stories of how businesses are trying to flourish during this time. Another place in my hometown is advertising on social media websites about what the dish of the day will be, and it includes family meals with discounts.

I’ve heard many different ways restaurants are trying to make money throughout the world. Some are aggressively advertising online, stating that they are still open, and that they will even deliver food to houses, which only shows just how desperate restaurants are for customers. Then there are some restaurants that are hosting cocktail hours and live music on their website for people to dine at home with. Whatever way restaurants make money, the fact is, they are at least trying. We need to keep supporting each other by remembering that these places are still open, it’s just that we can no longer sit and dine at them.           

I’m not going to ignore the elephant in the room, even though people have been pointing it out for a month now; the Coronavirus. Let’s all take a pause for this post and realize what’s happening in the restaurant world. Restaurants and bars are all closing down throughout the states due to this infectious virus. To truly understand why this is happening, people need to know why the Coronavirus (COVID-19) is so dangerous.

COVID-19 is a contagious virus, mainly affecting the ages of people 30+, that has been spreading across not only the nation within the past month, but the entire world. This virus first started off slow, with barely any recognition, until the dangers could no longer be ignored. Since the spread of the virus is so rapid, the United States quickly took actions by shutting down schools, then social outings, and finally, any place that isn’t essential to living, which includes bars and restaurants.    

However, there is a bright side to this disaster; there can still be take-outs and drive-throughs. I know, this may not sound that good, but it’s at least somewhat of a shimmer of hope before I ruin it. How am I going to ruin it you may ask? Well, even if restaurants can still do take-outs, where does that leave waiters/waitresses? That’s right, they’re left in the dust. Sadly, many owners have had to lay-off their servers because there’s nothing for them to do. That leaves thousands of people unemployed, especially in smaller towns like where I live. The ban was enacted on March 18th, deeming that bars and restaurants were to be closed other than take-outs. This means that until the government lifts this ban, thousands of workers are unable to make money when they need it the most.

How can I possibly write about waiters/waitresses making money when none of them can? All that I can post about is, hopefully, this horrific problem we are facing is soon eradicated in time before the service industry is hit too hard. I feel bad for not only the food-service places getting shut down, but for every other place of business as well. This is no joking matter and shouldn’t be taken lightly. The only way for the country to recover from this as quickly as possible is for people to limit their social interactions and to practice social distancing.

Here are some helpful tips as ways to keep yourself safe, so this problem can be eradicated as soon as possible.

Tips

1. Wash your hands with soap and warm water, frequently
2. Maintain social distancing by keeping six feet between you and a person
3. Do not go out in groups of ten people or more, or no gatherings at all (depends on the state)
4. Stay home! Enjoy family time, developing a new hobby, or finishing housework

Dun-du-du-nuhhhh here comes the one and only, the best person to ever be allowed to walk into a restaurant, the one you cannot wait to serve; the Karens. Just kidding! We all hate “that” person. So, how do I start a blog off with the Karens? Well, let’s start off with what a Karen is.   

Karens don’t actually all have to be named Karen. It’s just that the name places an image of a middle aged woman with blonde hair and highlights, a bob-haircut, and long dangly earrings in a person’s mind. A Karen has a nasally voice and the first words are always “where is your manager.” A Karen is an 8% tipper with no sense of humility and will screech at the top of her voice for a to-go box while snapping her fingers at you. Karens, I can not stress this enough, are not always named Karen. However, I do advise that if you are serving a woman who says their name is Karen and matches this description, run far far away, because she might run you over with her white Subaru SUV.

Now that you know what you’re looking for, let’s talk about what Karens like to do. I’m writing this specifically to restaurants, but Karens can be found in any business place. The main reason why I absolutely hate Karens because they are terrible people to serve because if you don’t get their $7 costume ordered drink in a matter of thirty seconds, they’ll flip out.

Fortunately, I’ve only encountered one TRUE Karen throughout my waitressing career, but that one encounter could last me a lifetime. I won’t tell you the long, boring details, but in the short version, this lady was mad because there was a tax for using a credit card. This is totally out of my control but the lady laid into me, telling me that it was absolutely outrageous. I think that it was outrageous that this woman believed I controlled the charges of a random company. 

As this woman is yelling at me, I could just see the words form on her lips “I want to speak to your manager!” In the end, my manager told the woman that there was no way I could control the tax charge on credit card usage (what I was saying the entire time) and the woman basically said eff off. I obviously didn’t get tipped which wasn’t too much of a disappointment because Karens never tip above 10%, but I did get a generous tip from a couple that witnessed this ordeal. I love getting pity tips. 

The moral of the story is that if you ever see your self transforming into this—-> Be wary. You’re transforming into an unbeatable creature that requires a glass of pinot grigio and at least one flustered teenage employee to be satisfied with your life. Karens are awful for getting any money and should be handled with extreme caution.      

Now, besides reading my own stories, I would like to incorporate other waitresses that I know and acknowledge some of their experiences. Some of these stories that I was told really boggled my mind and quite honestly disgusted me, so hopefully it does the same for you.

The first story comes from a pettie, cute girl that is the same age as me. She works almost every weekend, and by the next Monday at school, she ALWAYS has a horrific story to tell. This girl is the bubbliest person I have ever met and to compare her to something, I would have to say she is like a unicorn constantly sliding down a rainbow. So, imagine how shocked I was when she told me, just recently, an older man told her to kill herself all because he didn’t get his food.

Being a waitress myself, I can not say this enough… WE ARE NOT IN CHARGE OF THE FOOD. Stop blaming your waitress. Sorry for the rant but it had to be said. Anyways, further into her story, my friend later explained that the cooks had made two different orders, which resulted in the man not getting his food while the rest of his party did (see, not the waitress’s fault). What really blew my mind was that the guy told her to kill herself just because his food was late and my friend was only able to wave it off like it was nothing. It’s a pity what some people tolerate just to make some money and how some people act because they believe they are superior.

In another story, my friend doesn’t only have to deal with unruly customers, but also very aggressive workers, specifically the dishwasher. She told me that this guy is almost 60 and harasses her daily, and I will not be repeating some of the things he has said to her. My friend also showed a picture to me of what this guy looks like and to sum it up, he has no teeth, bald, and a very creepy smile. However, I will end this on a decent note, she decided she finally had enough and had punched him in the face one night after he was constantly harassing her. 

Sadly, waitresses in many situations don’t just get verbally abused by customers, but also by asshole coworkers. My friend has dealt with a lot of stuff in the past, but still continues to waitress, not for the ‘friendly atmosphere’ or for the ‘great coworkers’, but for the money. No waitress in the world, that I know of at least, is happy to go to work to be mentally abused. Money can make people do crazy things and tolerate even crazier stuff.

I think it is about time I start writing about my own experiences as a waitress. I know you guys love just how much I complain about my life. So, relax, enjoy my misery, and feel free to cringe.

My first job ever was at a local bar/restaurant that was thirty seconds away from my house. For privacy reasons, I will not be naming this said restaurant, but believe me, this place was huge. Some nights, the place could have up to 100 people, and with a sketchy waitstaff and a terrible manager, most of those nights there would be 2-3 waitresses. I am explaining this just to try and depict how hectic it was.

I was running around like a chicken with its head cut off when an older gentlemen pulled me aside. I am clearly panicked, irritated, and trying to remain calm, when this guy decided to lecture me for several minutes about why I shouldn’t wear too much makeup and why socks are important.

 First off, I’ll explain the socks situation since I feel like the makeup is pretty explanatory. I was wearing Sperry shoes, as all adolescent teenage girls do, and I hate when people can see my socks, so I wore no-show socks. I, however, did not have the time or energy to explain to this man about my socks or my makeup. So, I let the man degrade me. I was always told that the customer was right, and if they are wrong, you pretend they’re right. It’s stupid, but I’m in it for the money.

Another story involved a couple and their son. I knew that these people were new because everyone knows everybody in my small community, and I had never seen these people before. If you have read any of my previous blogs, you may know where this is going.

So I took their orders, got them their food, and gave them their check. In between each interaction, I could see the dad kept nudging his son, who was clearly embarrassed and shy. I ignored it.

 After they had left and while I was cleaning their table, I saw that they had written something on the receipt. Surprise, surprise, there was a number with a winky face. I was not that thrilled. Don’t get me wrong, these people were extremely nice, very enthusiastic, and decent tippers, but my biggest pet peeve is when the PARENTS are trying to set their children up. It’s embarrassing for the waitress and for their child.

I did get a few laughs out of this with my co-workers, but I didn’t text the guy because I have a boyfriend. Fast forward a couple of days and the couple and their son come back. Luckily, one of my co-workers took their order. Unluckily, they kept asking her where the girl with the “winged eyes” was. Even more so, I had walked past their table and heard the father say “There goes your girlfriend.” I honestly felt bad for the son, since he can’t control what his parents say. But if any parents are reading this, please stop embarrassing your waitresses and children. I just want money, not your son.      

Here is a very easy way to anger your waitress; trying to slip them yours or one of your kid’s phone numbers. Yes, sometimes any waitress would love to have a smoking hot boy give them their number just like those romantic TV shows and then they fall in love, but in reality, the only people who do that are either the cocky frat-boys or the creepy old dudes. If you are going to slip me something, slip me a crisp $20. You know, something that I might actually use.

Also, could parents please stop trying to force their obviously younger, shy, awkward son upon their waitresses. It makes us feel awkward around them and vice versa, and personally, it creeps me out. They are basically pimping out their son. Great parents. It’s ok to joke around, but when you are constantly nagging about it, it really can weird out your waitress. And parents, if a waitress uses the words “hun”, “babe”, or “sweetie”, it’s not because we are testing out those nicknames to call them for the rest of our life, it is so that we come off more welcoming. A good waitress knows that in order to get a phenomenal tip, you have to make the customer feel at home. 

What I am trying to say here is that no, I do not want numbers, the flirtation, or the creepy man-handling; all I want is your money. Simple as that. If you are reading this and you’re thinking that whatever I’m saying is wrong, then YOU are the problem. Plus, most likely, someone has spit in your food, hope you enjoyed that.

Who knows, maybe that cheesy number-written-on-the-bill move works. But here’s a tip for you; if you are going to do that, might as well give yourself a leg up by giving your waitress a very generous tip. More money for us to spend on beauty products to “get pretty” for you (secretly getting coffee).

Here’s a major issue that needs to be discussed. I do not, I repeat, do NOT, dress up for you to belittle me. It is typical for a waitress to wear, whatever is allowed at that establishment, anything that will accentuate certain factors for a better tip. Now please, don’t confuse this with prostetution. Some may not dress to impress because they naturally have a compelling attitude, but some, like me, have to work it to make it. 

Especially found in the younger generation, sometimes it’s extremely hard to find clothes that are work-appropriate that are also appropriate for the summer weather. I would mainly work during the summer, and I would have to stand in the cooler so my whole face wouldn’t melt off. If a waitress, specifically a younger adult, is wearing shorts, it’s for a reason. Shorts are a wonderful invention; who doesn’t love jeans that are cut-off right below your buttcheeks? Specifically speaking, what guy doesn’t love that? Not only do shorts help keep you cool, but they also are great money makers.

Another great invention, that is seen in your typical TV show about waitresses, short skirts! Probably agreed by Rachel Green herself, skirts work with everything and make any Ross Geller lover-boy fall victim to your looks by pulling out their wallet. However, that does not give anyone, ANYONE, the excuse to man-handle a waitress’s goods. Those are her goods, or maybe even someone else’s.

Another way I dressup is my face. I’m not promoting the fact that wearing makeup makes every girl prettier, I’m just saying that it does for me. Everybody, young or old, loves a pretty, little girl waiting on them. Makeup not only attracts people, but it can be a great conversation starter. Lots of women, typically older, would ask how I did my makeup, then I’d share my “wisdom”, we’d bond, and then they would give me a better tip. I don’t wear makeup for the fun of it, every girl knows how time consuming and difficult it is for girls to do their makeup. I wear it because everybody loves a good smokey eye, and the moment anyone gets caught up in the face… Ka-Ching!

I would like to start this blog off with this common misconception. I have read countless stories all over the internet about waitresses getting jipped of their tips because there’s either an angry girlfriend or a guy who totally got the wrong idea. First off, I am NOT looking for your number. Sorry guys, but 9 out of 10 times, waitresses (or waiters) are just being extremely friendly because you hold our next car payment in your wallet. Let’s be honest, my $3.50 an hour wage isn’t going to cut it.

Also, you know that joke that you told that was mildly sexist? That was barely a joke and not even funny. I’m laughing on the outside but screaming into an empty abyss on the inside. A waitress will laugh because it makes you feel good. Making people feel good is a waitress’s job, not a hobby. This will generally lead to a generous tip. 

Second off, when your waitress slightly touches your shoulder, do not automatically think we are trying to get any lower than that. Maybe for your wallet, but that’s a dangerous trip that I would not want to venture for. And single fellas, don’t lie to yourself, we all know that’s the closet contact from any woman you have gotten for a couple of months. I would also like to dedicate a sentence to those douchebags that do leave their number on the receipt, but not just that, they also leave a pitiful tip. You guys are the literal meaning of human garbage.

And then, to all of those psychotic girlfriends who get mad at their bubbly waitress… stop. We hate being happy all the time, and believe me, half the time we are being flirty with you too. Waitresses don’t care about your gender, all they care about is who has the fattest wallet. So stop being insecure over a waitress, they are in and out of your life in less than an hour. If you’re that worried about your relationship, I think that maybe you should reconsider your life decisions.